Friday, November 18, 2016

Loving So Much It Hurts

Feeling overwhelmed, I went into the woods and sat on my favorite rock by a stream.  Listening to the water flowing down the hill, as well as all of nature’s music, brings me peace and comfort.  But this time was different.  My heart was heavy and I couldn’t help but break down sobbing, my tears falling into the creek and being carried to who knows where.  It’s like my very core was being torn from my body and the pain was unbearable. 

All of a sudden, I heard a rustle of leaves behind me and then a snap of a twig.  Startled, I turned around, and of course, it just had to be him.  “Jesus!  I don’t think I’m up to talking right now.”

With compassion in his eyes and voice, he gently replied, “It’s okay.  You don’t have to talk.  We can just be together.”

After a few moments, it all came pouring out of me.  The pain, the fear, the anxiety…everything I was feeling.  “My heart is aching so much for so many people right now, Jesus!  I just can’t imagine the fear they are feeling.  Many are being beaten, harassed, picked on, people are calling them the most horrific names, telling them to go back to where they came from, and some of the most vitriolic words and pictures are being written on walls and windows toward these people.  Even little children are feeling the fear.  Children!  What’s the world coming to?!?!”

Jesus sat down on the rock next to me and cradled me in his arms while wiping my tears with the edge of his long-sleeved shirt.  Brushing a strand of hair from my face, he said, “Karen, I understand.  I, too, am feeling the pain of the way people are treating each other, and I feel it deeper than you could ever imagine.  You would think that after so many thousands of years, people would finally understand my greatest commandment to love one another.  But they don’t.  Sure, some people say they believe in me and follow me, and yet they are doing everything but love one another.  And that breaks my heart.”

Looking into Jesus’ eyes, I sobbed, “But what can we do?  We’ve got to be able to do something!  I feel so lost, disillusioned, and my faith has taken a real hit in all this.  The pain I feel for what so many are going through has just become so excruciating that I feel like I’m about to fall apart.”

“Karen, never lose faith.  I am always here, and I am here through all this turmoil.  Man has free-will so he does what he does based on his beliefs.  Know that I am here in the midst of love.  The pure, unconditional, perfect love that I’ve always taught.  Now is the time for all of you to raise your loving vibrations so high that love can’t help but embrace others.  It’s happening.  People from all over are coming together to share the love, to stand up for each other, and support one another.  It doesn’t matter what they look like, what they believe, or what they represent.  They’re standing for love.  That is the love that we should build upon.  That is the love that will change lives and change the world.  That is the love that all spiritual masters from all religions have taught.  And many are taking that love and light in their hearts and becoming the light in other people’s darkness.  Remember that hate teaches us to love.”

Taking a breath, I asked, “You mean there’s hope?”

Jesus smiled and replied, “Yes, Karen, there’s always hope.  Never give up on hope and never give up on humanity.  They’ll always surprise you.”

At that, Jesus gave me a handkerchief to wash my tears with the cooling water of the creek.  When I turned back, he was gone.  When I looked to where he had been sitting, I found a sparkling crystal rock in the shape of heart.  I don’t know what’s going to happen, but my faith that love would always prevail was renewed and I felt at peace.

Note:  Many are wearing safety pins to show their love and support for their fellow sisters and brothers on this planet.  If you see someone wearing this pin, it means, “I am safe.  If you are Muslim, a woman, LGBQ, person of color, Latinx, trans, an immigrant, disabled, afraid…I am here.  Speak…I’ll listen.  I’ll hold you.  Stand up for you.  Sit down for you.  Shut up for you.  Do what I can to let you know…I love you.  This sign is how you’ll know me.”

“I see a world where our love of cooperation is greater than the fear that drives us apart.”  Gregg Braden

Published in the Cookeville Herald Citizen newspaper, November 18, 2016.


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