Friday, October 24, 2014

Love and Aloha

Today I read a newsletter written by a Unity friend of mine who is the minister of the Unity of Little Rock in Arkansas.  James is very connected to Hawaii and I love it that he sometimes includes Aloha in his Sunday services and uses a lot of their language.  Hawaii is my dream vacation and one of these days, I am going to get there for a visit.  Not for the commercialism, but for the spirituality of the land and the people.

In the Hawaiian language, they use the term Aloha, which means affection, peace, compassion, and mercy.  Most people only know it as a greeting to say hello or good-bye.  What a beautiful way to greet someone than with a word that basically means love!

As I did more research on the word Aloha, I found that there is an even deeper meaning.  Pilahi Paki, a Hawaiian philosopher, came up with a code that was derived from the acronym of Aloha.  It is as follows:  “A, Akahai, kindness, to be expressed with tenderness; L, LĂ´kahi, unity, to be expressed with harmony; O, `Olu`olu, agreeable, to be expressed with pleasantness; H, Ha`aha`a, humility, to be expressed with modesty; and A, Ahonui, patience, to be expressed with perseverance.”  Kahuna David Bray interpreted this code as, "Come forward, be in unity and harmony with your real self, God, and mankind. Be honest, truthful, patient, kind to all life forms, and humble."  He said that to the Elders, Aloha meant ‘God in us.’

Also in the newsletter, James mentioned that someone questioned how much we use the word ‘love’ and thought we used it too frivolously as in saying “I love my car,” “I love my puppy,” and so on.  I’ve seen this question before in some of the things I’ve read, and some people were very adamant that we shouldn’t use it except for the people we really love.  My thought is that we don’t use it enough and we’re seeing the results in our personal lives as well as in our world around us.   We seem to be seeing more hate than anything, especially if we believe everything we see and hear in the media and from some religious leaders and politicians. 

I’m a huge believer in telling everyone, humans and animals alike, that I love them.  I sign my letters with ‘love’ or ‘love and laughter.’  I tell my family, relatives, and friends all the time that I love them, and I expect nothing in return.  If you’ve read my columns or heard me speak, you know one of my main topics is unconditional love for all regardless of color, race, religion, culture, sexual preference, or whatever.  This is what all the great spiritual masters taught!  A friend once even affectionately called me “the Love Minister.” 

Am I perfect at it?  Heck no!  I struggle like anyone to love those who make it hard for us to love them for whatever reasons.  During those times, I try to see them as an innocent baby or child knowing that, as an adult, they are the way they are because of what they’ve been taught and the things they’ve experienced in life.  Everyone has a story and not everyone’s story has been easy. 

I love to love!  Sometimes, when I go for a walk, I’ll tell everything I see that I love it!  “I love you, trees!”  “I love you, sky!”  “I love you, dragonfly!”  “I love you, mailbox!”  It’s also important to love ourselves and to be able to look at that reflection in the mirror and say “I love you!”  When I’m out in public, I’ll sometimes shoot people Spirit wads of love!  Is all this silly?  Maybe.   But it’s a way of learning to be so filled with love for everyone and everything around us.  The more we say it, the more it fills us!  We have to empty that cup of love in order for more love to pour in! 

A great verse from the Bible states, "Love is patient, love is kind.  It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.  It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.  Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.  It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres."

Love really is the answer!  Call it God, Life, Universe, or whatever you want to call it.  Love is a powerful force and with it, we can change the world!

Wishing you and yours much Aloha!

 

Published in the Cookeville Herald Citizen newspaper October 24, 2014.

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Tuesday, October 14, 2014

Fear or Faith?

Fear.  According to an on-line dictionary, fear is described as “an unpleasant emotion caused by the belief that someone or something is dangerous, likely to cause pain, or a threat.”  Note the word ‘belief.’  It is only a belief that something bad is going to happen.  Not a fact. 

Will Smith said, “Fear is not real.  The only place that fear can exist is in our thoughts of the future.  It is a product of our imagination causing us to fear things that do not at present and may not ever exist.  Do not misunderstand me.  Danger is very real.  But fear is a choice.”

At the current time, there is a lot of fear being propagated by the media, some religions, and the medical and pharmaceutical industries when it comes to Ebola.  I would like to help us put things in perspective.  It’s not an epidemic in our country.  Yes, a few people have been diagnosed mainly from bringing it back from West Africa and my heart goes out to them.  But the key word is ‘few.’  Anthony Fauci, Director of the U.S. National Institute of Allergy and Infectious Diseases, said it would be "extraordinarily unlikely that it will be an outbreak at all because of the way we take care of people, how we have the capability of isolating them, how we understand what one needs to do to protect the health care providers, and the kinds of health care facilities we have."  According to disease experts, Ebola is spread via close and personal contact with bodily fluids from an infected person during the late stages of infection or after death.  It is also not airborne.  We also have to remember that these other countries do not have the sanitation, medical facilities, or medical personnel that we have here.

Julia Shaklee Sammons, Medical Director of Infection Prevention and Control at the Children's Hospital states, “Ebola is not easy to get, and that measles, one of the most infectious diseases in the world, is far easier to catch than Ebola.”  And according to the Baseline of Health Foundation, “You should be far more concerned about dying from lightning strikes (about 73 a year in the US), traffic accidents (about 33,000 fatalities a year), gun shots (30,000), and alcohol abuse (100,000). To put that in perspective: the number of people who have died from Ebola contracted outside of Africa in the entire history of mankind is zero. To date, no case of Ebola in humans has ever been contracted in the United States.”

Also consider this…  In 2011, lethal infections from hospitals affected an estimated 722,000 patients in the U.S. with about 75,000 of them dying from those infections.  According to the CDC, these infections affect one in 25 patients.  Compare this to the few with Ebola in our country and you will see how we should keep this in perspective. 

So, who gains from all this fear mongering?  The media gains because they know you will keep your eyes glued to their stations and will buy their papers and magazines.  The medical and pharmaceutical communities will gain because they know you will be buying the drugs and vaccines.  Always follow the money.  Let me be clear.  I am NOT saying that we should ignore the threat of Ebola and not do anything about it.  Let’s just be smart about it and keep it all in perspective.

Where does faith come in all of this?  The point I am trying to make is let’s not give our power to others in the name of fear to the point that we lose faith in Source/God/Spirit.  Let’s not let fear thoughts take over our minds and beliefs to the point where we are going to literally attract that which we fear, and let’s not let others scare us to death!  Literally!  We still need to keep our focus on love, good health, peace, harmony, and the belief that we have what it takes to handle this issue in our country, as well as in other countries.

Some of us in Unity believe that fear is ‘False Evidence Appearing Real.’  Fear does not have any meaning except for the meaning that you give to it.  Therefore, are we going to let fear rule our hearts, minds, and souls?  Or are we going to have faith in God (or the God of your understand)?  As Khalil Gibran said, “Faith is a knowledge within the heart, beyond the reach of proof.”  Personally, I refuse to let fear rule my life and am going to continue to focus on love.

Are you ready to let fear go?  Are you ready to be at peace?  Then believe it and it is so! 

Addendum:  To clarify, not all pharmaceuticals/drugs/medications were developed just so someone could gain financially, but many of them are.  Many times, these corporations will use fear just to get people to buy their drugs so that they can make millions/billions of dollars when there are many other safer alternatives than using drugs. or the threat is not a threat, but they make it sound like an epidemic so that people will go out and buy the drugs.  Please do your research before taking any medication and be informed.   


Published in the Cookeville Herald Citizen October 10, 2014.

Saturday, October 4, 2014

The Inner Voice of Spirit

Life sure is an adventure!  From the time we are born when we take our first breath, we are shot out of the starting gate and we keep going until we reach that finish line and take our last breath.  Everything in between is a journey to discovering who we really are and why we are here.  For many of us, those lessons come easily.  For others, we may leave this earth plane never knowing.  It is only when we become aware of who we really are that we learn that life is the question and we are the answer!  Jesus said that the kingdom of heaven is within, and when we go silently within, into our minds, our hearts, and our souls, we can hear that still, quiet voice of Spirit talking to us and it will never steer us wrong. 

Over the years, I’ve learned to listen to that inner voice of Spirit (or the God of your understanding), and when I listen, it gives me words of love, guidance, encouragement, comfort, and wisdom.  That inner voice has even kept me safe from harm so many times.  It’s given me words to say to others in their time of need.  And when I speak and/or write, it guides me to say and write whatever needs to be said at the time. 

Besides speaking to you, Spirit can and does give you signs.  After I moved here, I joined the wonderful organization called Toastmasters so that I could learn to speak in front of a crowd.  My first few times speaking at Toastmasters, and in the first couple of contests I entered, I was so nervous that I had to grip my hands together so that people wouldn’t see them shaking.  Before my first big contest, I was a nervous wreck.  While driving on the way to the contest, I was freaking out and asked Spirit for some kind of sign that everything was going to be okay.  At that very second, I happened to look up in the sky, and I saw a cloud in the shape of a beautiful angel!  It only lasted a few seconds, so if I had not have looked up when I did, I would have missed her.  I also heard the words within, “Just do the best you can and have fun!  Leave the rest up to me!”  It was then that I knew everything was going to be okay no matter the outcome.  I went on to the contest and won!  Remembering the angel’s message, I also went on to several other contests and made it to the District level winning third place.

It is said that the number one fear people have is the fear of public speaking.  My theory is that people don’t fear speaking so much as they fear what people will think of them while they’re speaking.  If someone knew their talk would be wonderful, they wouldn’t worry so much.  Besides, Terry Cole Whittaker said, “What other people think of me is none of my business.”  In the beginning, I would use notes and tended to rely on those notes.  Then many years ago, I went to hear Wayne Dyer speak and he said he used notes in the beginning, too.  But then he said something that taught me a great lesson.  We need to trust that what’s meant to be said will be said, and what isn’t meant to be said will be left out.  We need to trust that Spirit will speak through us and people will hear what they are meant to hear.  What a great concept and one I use to this day!  That doesn’t mean that I still don’t beat myself up sometimes wishing I had said or not said something (and this includes my writings), but when I do, Spirit will give me a loving spiritual smack on the back of my head and gently say, “Stop it!  It’s over!  Let it go!” 

There are many people who don’t believe that Spirit/God (or whoever you believe that voice to be) doesn’t speak to us directly, and that’s okay.  For those of us who do, it’s so reassuring to believe that something greater, which is also within us, is in charge.  We can connect to Spirit’s voice by praying, meditating, communing with nature, listening, and so much more.

We are so much greater than we believe we are!  As Neale Donald Walsh stated, “You think of yourselves as humans searching for a spiritual awakening, when in fact you are spiritual beings attempting to cope with a human awakening. Seeing yourselves from the perspective of the Spirit within will help you to remember why you came here and what you came here to do.” 


Published in the Cookeville Herald Citizen newspaper October 3, 2014.
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Thursday, October 2, 2014

The Life of a Free Spirit

I admit it.  I’m a free spirit.  Have been most of my adult life.  Once in awhile in conversations with someone and telling them some of the things I’ve done in my life, they’ll comment, “Boy!  You sure have done a lot in your life!”  That statement would always catch me off guard and cause me to think, “Have I really done so much?”  Then I would wonder if that’s a good thing or a bad thing. 

Mainstream society would label it as a bad thing.  They would say that those who have done so much don’t know what they want out of life and are basically goofballs.  They expect everyone to get married, settle down, have children, and stay at the same job for years.  I don’t know how many times it has been suggested to me to get married and settle down.  Settle down to what?  Settle down to a life that isn’t or wasn’t meant for me?  Crush my spirit and force me to conform to society’s standards?  I’m definitely not putting down marriage or holding a long term job so please don’t misunderstand!  Those are perfectly fine!  Sometimes I think I would love to be married and share the rest of my life with someone.  Right now, I’m okay being single.  I have married friends who envy my being single!  As they say, the grass is always greener on the other side of the septic tank! 

What are some of the things I’ve done and/or accomplished?  I lived on an Indian Reservation in British Columbia.  Went to both a Bible college and a horse management college.  Worked for Wayne Newton on one of his horse ranches outside of Las Vegas.  Was a nurse’s aide in a hospital.  Lived in Hollywood, California, and Nashville, TN, pursuing my dream of an acting and dancing career; was in movies, TV shows, commercials, and music videos.  Studied martial arts and was awarded a black belt.  Achieved an Associates’ degree in Natural Health and Nutrition.  Went on two cruises to the Caribbean with health guru Richard Simmons.  Belonged to Toastmasters (speaking club).  Write for the Religion Section of the Herald Citizen, Putnam County Visions Magazine, and other magazines.  Was secretary and later president on the board of my church, and am currently a Chaplain.  Volunteered as a Chaplain at the hospital.  Became a substitute teacher.  Achieved my Bachelors and Masters as a minister, and then a Doctorate as a Doctor of Holistic Ministry.  During these times I had a few full time jobs (good and bad) and many temporary jobs with temp agencies.  But I always paid my own way and paid my own bills.  Oh, yes, and came close to getting married a couple of times. 

Can we say, “Whew?”  Now some people may look at all of my experiences and wonder what the heck was wrong with me that I couldn’t stay at one particular thing.  My answer to that question is, “Why?”  Looking back on my experiences, they have all been blessings.  No, not all of them were totally fun-filled adventures, as I’ve also faced my share of challenges.  I’ve had many experiences along the way with some not-so-nice people who treated me horribly, and I had a breakdown that completely took me off the grid causing me to give up my dreams of a career in the entertainment business.  But in hindsight, I wouldn’t change any of these experiences because they have all taught me so much. 

Living on the Indian Reservation introduced me to an extraordinary culture and some really amazing people.  I also gained some treasured friendships that I still have to this day.  They became my family and I theirs.

The Bible College was very stringent and I couldn’t do a lot of the things I enjoyed because of their beliefs, so I quit.  I learned on my own that I could have my beliefs without being so strict and judgmental towards others.  I could still dance, go to movies, and enjoy life without a religion using guilt and fear to try to control me. 

Working at a hospital taught me to count my blessings because I saw so many who were so much worse off than me.  I learned how to treat people with compassion and kindness.

Living in Hollywood and Nashville pursuing a career in the entertainment business was a fabulous adventure as I met and got to know some really famous and not so famous people.  Before I moved to Hollywood, I was told by several, including my minister at the time, that if I moved out there and became an actress, I would go straight to hell because all Hollywood people were evil.  But I met some of the most wonderful, loving, and caring people!  I learned that those in the entertainment business were just like any of us, but doing a different kind of job.  I also learned that you find what you’re looking for and I found so much good!

I loved working for Wayne Newton!  He was always kind to me, though I can’t say that for everyone who worked on his ranch.  I learned some insights into what it is to be a famous entertainer.  

Studying the martial arts gave me more confidence and I learned to defend myself if I needed to.

Achieving my degrees in nutrition, as a minister, and as a Doctor of Holistic Ministry has been a wonderful journey in learning.  The wisdom and knowledge I’ve gained will last me a lifetime.

Everything I have experienced in my life has made me a better and stronger person and has made me who I am today.  I like who I am, though I may not always like who I’m not.  There is still so much more that I want to do and accomplish.  I want to travel the world!  Write a book!  Become a successful speaker!  Do what I can to help make the world a better place!

The reason I write this article is not to boast, “Hey!  Look at all I’ve done!”  The point is that there may be many of you, or even your children, who are also free spirits.  You may be frustrated because you feel that you have to conform to your family’s or society’s demands to be who or what they think you should be.  Or maybe you’re doing this to your children; trying to force them to live your unfulfilled dreams for you.  Trying to make them be, do, or have everything according to your wishes for them.  I know that most parents only want what’s best for their children, but we really should want what they think is best for them as long as they harm no one, including themselves.  Let them make their own decisions as to what they want to do with their future.  Let them learn from their own mistakes.  They, and only they, are the ones who have to live and answer for their lives, and that’s also true for us. 

How many of us grow up looking back and regretting not so much the things we did, but the things we didn’t do just because someone else said no, or our dreams were belittled or made fun of, so we gave up?  Whatever we’re doing now, maybe we’re happy or maybe we’re not.  If we’re not, we stay anyway because we think that’s what’s expected of us.  So we learn to be happy being miserable.  Many turn to addictions to try to numb the pain and fill that void of not being able to fulfill our life’s purpose.

My motto is you never know unless you try.  There are countless people who had others try to quash their dreams, but they persevered and became very successful in spite of whatever obstacles were put in their way.  Maybe they won’t fulfill that particular dream, but that dream lead into something else more fantastic and exciting!  My dream of an entertainment career got side-tracked into a speaking career.  I say that I’m still entertaining, but now I’m entertaining with a message!

Even though you may still have dreams you’d like to pursue, it’s not too late.  The important thing is to not regret the past.  Everything we’ve experienced has brought us to where we are today.  But we don’t have to be defined by our past!  We can change our future!  Everything we’ve experienced, on a soul level, was meant to be experienced.  Wherever we are right now is okay.  A beloved minister and friend of mine used to always say “You’re in the right place, at the right time, right now.” 

We have choices even if we think we don’t have a choice (even that is a choice).  We can choose to be a victim of our past, or a hero of our future.  Never give up on your dreams!  They may need to be adapted, though, because you have a family or other life obligations.  When it comes to your children, they may not want to do or be what you want them to do or be, but let them try to find their own way.  Give them a chance to live their dreams.  Remember how it felt not to be able to live your own?  Encourage them, support them, and help them if you can.  It’s their experiences, and they have to live their own lives.  Please don’t contribute to their looking back and regretting things they haven’t done just because you told them no.  But know, too, that’s it perfectly okay to expect them to pay their own way.

Our biggest dream in life should be to be happy!  Do and be what makes you happy!  Follow your bliss and everything else will fall into place!

Eleanor Roosevelt said, “The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams.”  Walt Disney stated, “All our dreams come true if we have the courage to pursue them.”  Harriet Tubman exclaimed, “ Every great dream begins with a dreamer. Always remember, you have within you the strength, the patience, and the passion to reach for the stars to change the world.”  And Henry David Thoreau said, “If one advances confidently in the direction of his dreams, and endeavors to live the life which he has imagined, he will meet with a success unexpected in common hours. 

Do you have a dream?  Do your children have their dreams?  It’s okay to be a free spirit!  Just remember….  You’ll never know unless you try! 


Published in the Putnam County Visions Magazine, October 2014 issue.